This week marks two years since I graduated college. On the 11^th, I had a memory pop up on my phone of my siblings, dad, aunt, and cousin singing karaoke with me on the night of my graduation—such troopers. I was so shocked by this memory that I really had to stop and think about how much time has already passed since I stumbled across that stage. I never really shared graduation pics on the blog, but I intended to for weeks and weeks—and now somehow those weeks have already turned into two years! Wow. While I loved college, I love not being in school even more, and I feel like I’ve learned and observed so much in my post-grad life that I wasn’t necessarily expecting. So without further ado, here’s a collection of random realizations and thoughts I’ve had in the past two years as I come to terms with what life looks like without school.

Raising a Family? HOW?!

I am the youngest of my coworkers by several years, so most of them are worlds beyond me in life—they’re married, they have children, etc. Listening to them talk about their families and lives outside of work (“I have to run so-and-so to basketball practice, then I have to drop so-and-so off at art camp,” and so on…) makes my jaw drop in wonder of how they do it all. I’m over here trying to handle my laundry, and make dinner, and bring myself to take my car to the car wash because I hate doing it. And that feels like a lot. I can barely manage myself, let alone multiple little humans! Not that I’m in the market to start a family anytime soon, but I’m constantly wondering how these parents work full-time jobs, raise children, and do all the other basic life things. I’m so impressed. But I also find myself wondering if they have any time for themselves…

It’s Really Hard to Make Friends

I don’t think I’ve made a single new friend since graduating college. Where does one meet new people? How does one tell if someone is open to friendship? I do not know (and yes, I’ve been speaking in Bridgerton talk lately). I’m pretty happy with my social circle as it exists now, but when my friends talk about leaving Colorado, I find myself wondering what I will do once they move… I love my coworkers, but since they are in such a different stage of life than me, I find it hard to imagine we would ever hang outside of the office. And aside from work, I don’t really interact with people. I was on an adult soccer team for a while and met people that way, but none of them really stuck. When I think about my parents and their friends, a lot of them came about through their children—at the school pick-up line, at sporting events, etc. When you’re in your 20s, after school and before family life, I just don’t think there are as many obvious ways to meet people—if you want more friends, you really have to work for it, especially in the age of remote jobs.

Traveling is Expensive

Like a lot of people, I always imagined spending my 20s traveling the world. But now that I’m here? I think I’m going to have to get a lot smarter and more creative to make that happen… Of course I always knew traveling is pricey, but I guess it never really hit me just how much until I started planning trips of my own. Sometimes I’ve said to my boyfriend, “We should go on a weekend trip since we can’t go on a big trip this year,” but even a weekend away can get to be too much after hotel rooms, plane tickets, a rental car, and food. I can’t imagine trying to take a whole family on vacation!

What Does Success Look Like?

In school, there were very clearly defined paths forward—get into these colleges, take those classes, get this grade. But once you graduate? I don’t know how to define success anymore. Is it to make a certain amount of money? To get a certain promotion? I didn’t know what I wanted to study when I started college, and now, several years later, I still don’t know “what I want to be when I grow up.” On top of that, I’ve recently come to realize that I am a terrible goal setter. So now I feel like I’m just floating through my 20s, with no direction and no end goal. I know I have to define success and my own path forward, but I’m just struggling to do that when previously everything was laid out for me.

Time—Is There More or Less of It?

Like so many students, I used to spend class daydreaming about what life would be like when I no longer had homework. I would have so much time! I could go home after work and finally pursue all the things I was too busy for before! And for one glorious year after graduating, I did feel like I was living the dream. I was working, I was dating, I was blogging, and I had time to relax every night after dinner. But now—as I’m sure you know if you’re an avid reader of my blog—I feel like I’m back to where I was, with no time. In some ways, I seem even worse off now. In college, I took the max credit hours every semester, had a part-time job, was a member of several clubs and sports teams, maintained my blog, and still found time to socialize. I constantly wonder how I balanced it all back then and what I seem to be doing wrong now. More importantly, perhaps, I wonder what shifted between my first year post-grad, where everything was coming together how I always imagined, and my second year, where I feel like I’ve lost that post-college-no-homework dream. I’m still trying to figure it out, but I would love to hear from other 20-somethings if they feel like they have more time to relax and enjoy themselves now, or if they just filled that time with different things…

I hope you enjoyed today’s post. I think about these topics all of the time as I try to figure out what kind of life I want to build for myself. If you’re a recent graduate or also in your 20s, I would be so interested to hear if any of these things resonate with you or if you have additions to the list!

 

Miles of smiles,
Grace